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Stillborn. Still my child.

Stillbirth can feel like a very lonely journey but it doesn’t have to be. I share my story to help others, to have a place for my thoughts and to honor my son.

Samuel’s Story

To the parent who found this site after the loss of their own precious baby, I’m so sorry. It’s a unique and painful grief that will be with you forever. Please know you are not alone. While the pain doesn’t go away, you do learn to live with it and it can evoke a strength you never knew you had. Give yourself grace, give yourself time and don’t be afraid to let the world know about your baby. They are still your child.

Latest from the Blog

Samuel’s Space

Sometimes during this journey you get so caught up in your own space that you don’t realize the impact your story has on someone else. I was completely shocked that friends I volunteer with at the Ronald McDonald House Charities of Dayton went above and beyond in helping us remember our sweet boy by naming…

How much I cried that day

“No one will ever know how much I cried that day.” It’s a quote that took my breath away as I scrolled across a loss site one day. Maybe because it’s so incredibly accurate: I don’t think I’ve ever cried as much in my life than the day we got to meet and say goodbye…

I’m mad at my body

You had one job: keep your baby safe. Body, you failed me. Stillbirth is an emotional journey but it can also be a physical one. Often times, the toll it takes on a body is forgotten. I’m mad at my body. I feel like it failed me, betrayed me. How could it have carried a…

Books I clung to:

  • They Were Still Born. Personal Stories about Stillbirth. Edited by Janel C. Atlas.
  • An Exact Replica of Figment of my Imagination by Elizabeth McCracken
  • You are not alone. Love Letters from Loss Mom to Loss Mom by Emily Long.
  • Joy at the End of the Rainbow. A Guide to Pregnancy After a Loss by Amanda Ross-White.

Sites I clung to: